Some times a day can seem like a thousand years. Each second that ticks by can seem like endless hours....and some journey's can seem like they may never end. Marriage can seem the longest journey of them all at times. When we first fall in love, we adore being with each other and we live for the next moment that we can see each other or talk to each other....we never seem to have enough time with each other....at first. Then we come to that beautiful moment....the proposal, the wedding, and then.....life.
It is when we start truly living life with each other that the problems can set in. Finances become strained or long talks with each other turn into long hours at the office. Children may come and make time difficult to find, parents, in-laws, illness,.....the list can go on and on. Do you know that few people make it to the first five years, and even fewer make it to ten years of marriage? That breaks my heart. What causes us to feel so in love one moment and then in the next struggle with even liking that person? What causes the beautiful moment of walking down the aisle turn into the heart-wrenching sobs as we walk out of the court room after the divorce? Where is the peace?
Peace. Such a tiny word....only five little letters. But it is one of the most rusty of spiritual weapons for many of us! I will be honest here....I have struggled with writing this blog because I struggle with this more than all the others. So I cannot tell you how I have found the perfect system that creates the most beautiful of peace....because I haven't. But I can tell you what I am learning and share my heart with you about this seemingly mysterious gift...peace.
My children are growing up and as they become adults, some of them are walking away from what we have taught them. Some of them are pursuing sin over holiness and this causes my heart to be greatly burdened. Some of my children still fight demons from their past and the abuse that their birth parents did to them....this causes my heart to weep many a tear. Finances can be stressful as bills come and go and add up more and more.....marriage is hard and we can never stop fighting for it....even when we are just. so. tired......and all of this can equal anything but peace. It can equal fear. It can bring insecurity and negative thoughts by the waves....but peace? Does God REALLY expect us to walk each day, each situation....in peace? Is that even possible?
The answer I am learning is yes. It IS possible and God does desire this for us. He longs for us to simply trust His heart and lead us in EVERY SITUATION we are in. He wants us to walk each moment in surrender to HIS WILL. This is where we find peace. In surrender.
When I hold on to "my" dreams, what I think my children should do, what I believe my marriage should look like....or even simpler stuff such as what I want my house to look like, or the job that I feel I should have....in the holding on to these things....I am holding on to dead dreams. All of ME has to die for Christ to live. Now I get that many of you might think, " but God is the one who has given me these dreams, so He must want me to have them."....but I just want to challenge you on that a little because I too have said that very thing.
God IS peace. Everything about Him IS peace. His way=peace. His thoughts=peace. His plans=peace. His desires= peace. HE = peace.
If I am in war inside myself, constantly struggling with discontent or frustration, I may be wanting my way more than God's. Because regardless of how bad any situation looks like, if I am walking in surrender to God, I will have peace. It is a promise. Isaiah 26:3, " You will keep in perfect peace those whose mind is steadfast, because they trust in You.". That doesn't mean we will walk in rainbows and butterflies all the time....but we can walk in peace. I think part of the problem sometimes with peace, is that we think of peace as a "feel good feeling"....but that isn't peace. Peace is a quiet in our soul. It is a calm inside of us in the middle of a storm. Peace is freedom from disturbance. Peace is not something physical. It is a spiritual fruit...from a spiritual being...the Holy Spirit. It is surrendering us allowing HIM to take control. And it is HARD at times!
Sitting by a fireplace in a cabin high in the mountains is one of my favorite places to be....and I feel "peace" there.....maybe for you it is the beach or surrounded by family and friends or sitting with a good book or good movie.....but this is not the kind of peace that God desires for us. This is a feeling of calm for a moment. God desires for us to walk each moment in peace. The peace HE offers to us...it is when all of life is falling apart, but your heart is calm. It is when you should be crumbling on the floor, but instead you are praising. IT is when you face the giant, the fire, the lion, the storm, the whale, the persecution, the diagnosis, the rejection, the pain....the WHATEVER....and your heart is standing firm. This simply cannot be done on our strength. But it most certainly CAN be done through Christ.
We CAN walk out this life in peace....but we first have to let go of...well....of us. We have to surrender ALL....and when we do....peace is there. I still find it amazing that it is in the letting go of control that we are stronger in peace. It is so contrary to what the world teaches us about being in control of our destiny and being in charge of our lives and our way....but God says to let go. To let HIM control us. To let HIM direct us and guide us and trust HIM with every decision we make. This is where peace is....this is WHO peace is. So if you want to really live out each day in peace....surrender. I still have so much to learn about peace....but I am learning. And I am so grateful for the journey that it has taken for me to learn and study more about peace. We are all just students....children...learning from our Father....and He loves to teach us. He loves to share His heart with us! If only we will seek Him....with our WHOLE heart. No holding back...arms thrown wide open and completely vulnerable to Him! I pray each of us will truly understand peace and what it is to walk in it every day no matter what is going on around us!
