Thursday, October 2, 2014

The mask we wear....

        I have decided that out of all the groups of people there are in this world, those who call themselves "Christians" wear the most masks...we hide our antidepressant medications, we sneak our addictions in when no one is watching, we don't talk about that certain show we like watching on tv, or we pretend we like our spouse or children while at church so we can come home and ignore or yell at them....we cry on the way to church because our hearts are broken but once we get there, we wipe our tears and put on our smile....while our hearts are breaking inside of us....what bothers me about all this is the "why"....
       Why do we as believers feel such a need to "hide" our true selves. I have thought and thought about this because it is really bothering me. We can never have true freedom until we start being honest. We can never have a relationship with each other that is "closer than a brother" unless we know what is really going on in our lives. I don't know if it is our fear of being judged, or our fear of being exposed as a "fraud"... or maybe it is because we know we are doing something wrong but aren't really interested in giving it up or don't know how to if we want to....or maybe it is simply that we feel pressure to always have a "happy" face on and feel if we don't somehow we are not "godly" or "faith filled.".....but whatever it is....it is wrong.
        Should we have discretion? Of course! Will some people be rude or judge or talk about us behind our backs....most likely it will happen at some point. But those people will talk or judge no matter what we do or how we live....so why do we let them have any control over us on how we live our lives? I was so guilty of this in so many ways just a few months ago....and then everything fell apart. My husband decided to go into a rehab for his addictions and my daughters mental illness was getting worse. Things were just getting hard and God was telling me to just take off the mask and be real. I argued with Him quite a bit...I mean in all fairness...I didn't "intentionally" put on a mask. I was just being polite and not burdening everyone with my problems...right?
        He would not relent. He just kept speaking to my heart about His freedom and He brought me to nearly every Scripture on TRUTH that is written....you know...the TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE.....and all that:) And you know what? As terrified as I was of what people would do to our family and how they would treat us, I wasn't willing to ignore what He was telling me to do. So I wrote. And guess what....all those terrible things that were going to happen to us...didn't. Instead of judgement and rudeness, we were treated with love and compassion. We were treated like family. Because that is what we are.
       That is what all of it boils down too. The family you live with every day are the ones who see you when depression as crept in and you can't get off the couch or out of the bed. Our families are the ones who see us when we nearly lose it with our children. Our families are the ones who see the hurt stream down our face as our hearts simply can't bear one more thing. Our families are the ones who know us...the real us...and as followers of Christ, we are family.
     So what if we truly took off the mask...what if we admitted that we struggle with depression and just had to up our meds. What if we said that our marriages our struggling. What if we said that we felt like failures as parents. What if we said we were scared, hurt, or filled with regrets....what if we just opened our hearts up for our family of Christ to see? What would happen? Well....I did. And we were surrounded by our family with love, we were encouraged through letters and phone calls, our spirits were lifted because we knew people cared about us. And if you think about it....maybe that is one reason we keep the mask on. We just don't truly believe that people care about us and our "issues" in life.  But they do.
       The way that Christ wants His followers to walk is in a family unit. The New Testament is full of His wisdom teaching us how to walk as a family...and Jesus himself even showed us how to become family with other followers just like He became with His disciples. He gave us what we need to do it, but we still have to take that step and reach up and take off that mask...we have to be willing to be vulnerable and exposed. But it's ok....because deep down inside, everyone is struggling in some way. Every one of us, rich or poor, healthy or sick, great faith or small faith....we are all still learning. I just think it would be pretty amazing to learn together!
       There is another thing I have learned from taking off the mask...it is very difficult to fight with it on. You have to constantly be worried about it falling off so you can't focus on defeating the enemy. Many times, you can't even see the enemy because the mask is blinding your sight. And that is what satan wants us to be....blind. God gave us all the armor we would need to fight in Ephesians 6...and He never once mentions a mask....a helmet yes. A helmet protects our minds...our thoughts....but a mask protects nothing, it only hides what we don't want anyone to see. Some of us have such beautiful mask! We have went to great difficulty in making it the most beautiful one you will ever see...and on the outside it looks like you have it all....but under the mask...there lies the pain and the hurt that you are desperate to hide. Some of us have mask that are scary looking on the outside. You have worked very hard for people to fear you or be intimidated by you so they will not see the hurt and sadness hiding underneath the mask....and some of us have different mask for each situation in our life, because to not wear one would be the single most terrifying thing you can imagine.

      There is freedom in taking off that mask. We will still love you. We will still stand by you and support you. We will not abandon you....because the Holy Spirit is the One who is teaching us. And because we are right there with you...sometimes I pray that God will have us lower our mask just long enough to realize that we are in the same boat with so many others. We are not alone on an island, but surrounded by others who are afraid of lowering their mask. I know it's scary....I know you may have a panic attack at the mere thought....but be brave. Lower the mask. Look around and see....us....your family. And taste the freedom that God has longed for you to have all this time! Be brave....I promise it is worth it.

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